Who to prioritise, my partner or my baby? It's a no-brainer | Polly Hudson

Parental Priorities: The Delicate Balance Between Love for Child and Partner

Polly Hudson, a seasoned writer, has had her fair share of personal struggles with parenting guru Gina Ford's methods. Ford recently sparked controversy by suggesting that prioritizing one's child over their partner can put even the strongest relationships at risk.

Hudson recalls how Ford's book contributed to her own feelings of inadequacy as a mother, despite following the author's strict guidelines to the letter. The sleep-deprived writer felt like a "hopeless failure" and resorted to sharing her concerns with her husband in a desperate bid for understanding. However, Hudson argues that prioritizing one's child is not only natural but also essential for many parents.

The debate centers around whether the stress of caring for a child can lead to relationship strain. Ford believes that when parents become overly focused on their children, they forget about themselves and the importance of maintaining a healthy partnership. While this may be true for some families, Hudson counters that love and devotion towards one's partner are not mutually exclusive with those feelings towards one's child.

In fact, Hudson argues that many parents put their children at the forefront of their minds because it is an instinctual response to nurturing and protecting those they care about. The writer shares a personal anecdote from her friend who was asked to choose between saving his wife or child in a burning building; he initially chose his wife but later realized that his feelings were misplaced.

Ultimately, there are no easy answers when it comes to navigating the complexities of parenthood and relationships. Hudson concludes that what matters most is acknowledging the unique dynamics at play within each family and approaching challenges with empathy and understanding.

As Hudson so astutely puts it, "The truth, of course, is that there are no right answers here, no one-size-fits-all method or solution; it's different for everybody."
 
lol gotta agree w/ Polly Hudson on this one 🀩! I mean, who hasn't felt like a total failure as a parent at some point? πŸ˜‚ it's all about finding that balance, you know? For me, prioritizing my little one is not only natural but also super important for my mental health (aka sanity) πŸ˜‰. My partner's always been super supportive, and we make sure to carve out time for each other too πŸ’•. It's not a competition, it's about loving those two tiny humans to bits and making sure they're happy and healthy πŸ€±β€β™€οΈπŸ‘§. That Gina Ford method just doesn't work for me, tbh... too strict πŸ˜’. As Hudson said, it's all about empathy & understanding - every family's different, you know? πŸ’–
 
I think Gina Ford's comments on prioritizing children over partners might be a tad oversimplified. I mean, isn't it natural to want to provide the best possible life for your little ones? It's not like being a parent is all about personal fulfillment alone 😊. What Hudson brings up is that love and devotion towards one's partner aren't mutually exclusive with those feelings towards one's child. In fact, having a strong partnership can actually help you be an even better parent in the long run 🀝.

It's also worth considering that some parents might genuinely struggle to balance their responsibilities and prioritize tasks due to circumstances beyond their control, like financial stress or health issues. Rather than shaming them for it, we should aim to offer more nuanced support and resources πŸ’‘.
 
I'm not sure I agree with Gina Ford's stance on this. I mean, can you blame parents for putting their child's needs first? It's instinctual, right? πŸ€” My friend has two kids and she says that when they were tiny, she didn't even have time to think about her own husband! But as the kids got older and more independent, she started making more time for them. And you know what? Her relationship actually improved.

For me, it's all about balance. I get that some parents might get so caught up in their child's needs that they forget about themselves and their partner. But I don't think that's true for most people. Most parents just need to prioritize and communicate with their partner. Like my sister-in-law, she and her hubby have a system down pat - they take turns with the kids and make sure each other is happy too.

I do think it's possible that relationships can get strained if one parent is super focused on the kid, but I don't think it's because the love for child is diminished. It's more about the stress of caring for someone else 24/7 and not having time for yourself or your partner. πŸ’€

Anyway, I think we should be having this conversation rather than just jumping to conclusions. Let's hear from both sides! πŸ—£οΈ
 
I FEEL LIKE THIS IS SUCH A REAL ISSUE FOR SO MANY PEOPLE! 🀯 I mean, as a parent myself, i know how hard it can be to balance everything - work, relationship, and of course, our little ones. It's like, we just wanna do what's best for our kid, but sometimes that means putting their needs before ours and vice versa.

AND I THINK POLLY HUDSON IS RIGHT ON THE MONEY WHEN SHE SAYS THAT LOVE AND DEVOTION TOWARDS OUR PARTNER ARENT MUTUALLY EXCLUSIVE WITH THOSE FEELINGS TOWARDS OUR KID. πŸ€— My hubby always says i'm his partner in every sense of the word, and i think that's so true. We're a team, not separate individuals.

BUT AT THE SAME TIME, I GET WHY GINA FORD WOULD SAY WHAT SHE SAYS. πŸ€” I mean, we do have to prioritize our kid's needs, but that doesn't mean we should neglect our own relationship in the process. It's all about finding that balance and communicating with each other.

I THINK THE KEY IS TO JUST BE HONEST WITH OUR PARTNER AND HAVE AN OPEN CONVERSATION ABOUT WHAT WE NEED FROM EACH OTHER. πŸ’¬ And to remember that it's okay to ask for help sometimes - whether it's our partner, family, friends, or a therapist!
 
I think Polly Hudson makes a really valid point πŸ€”. I mean, I've seen tons of parents struggle to balance their kids' needs with their own relationships. It's not always easy, and sometimes it feels like you're constantly playing catch-up. But what Hudson said is true - love for your child doesn't have to come at the expense of your partner πŸ’•. In fact, having a strong relationship can actually help you be a better parent 🀝. And let's be real, parenting is already super stressful 😩, so finding ways to support each other and prioritize both your family and your relationship is key. I don't think there's one-size-fits-all solution here - it's all about finding what works for you and your partner as a team πŸ‘«πŸ’—
 
It's all about finding that balance πŸ€Έβ€β™€οΈ. When you have a child, your priorities shift, but that doesn't mean you're not capable of loving and caring for someone else - like your partner 😊. It's not an either-or situation; it's more like both-and πŸ’–.
 
I mean, come on... can't we just accept that being a good parent means putting your child first? It's not like you're neglecting your partner or something. And yeah, I totally get where Gina Ford is coming from - her methods may be strict, but they've helped countless parents in the past. But at the same time, I can see how prioritizing one's kid can be overwhelming and strain relationships. It's all about finding that balance, imo πŸ‘€πŸ’€
 
I'm totally with Gina Ford on this one πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ. I think prioritizing your child over your partner can be a recipe for disaster πŸ’”. I mean, what if you're that friend who has to choose between saving your wife or child in a burning building? Shouldn't your love and devotion towards both be equal? πŸš’πŸ˜­ It's not about being selfish, it's about making sure you're there for both people who matter most. And let's be real, if you can balance work and parenting without neglecting your partner, that's a win in my book πŸ’ͺ. I don't think it's healthy to compartmentalize your emotions like that πŸ˜•. Just sayin'
 
I think this whole thing about prioritizing our kids vs partners is just a reminder to appreciate the little things in life πŸ™. I mean, sure, Gina Ford might have gotten some points wrong, but Polly Hudson makes some great points too! She's right that love and devotion towards our partner doesn't have to be mutually exclusive with feelings for our kid(s). My hubby and I are a total team when it comes to raising our little one, and we make time for each other because we know how important it is for our own sanity (and relationship) 🀝. At the end of the day, it's all about finding that balance and being present in both our parenting and partnership roles ❀️.
 
πŸ€” This article is bringing up some really interesting points about the delicate balance between love for our children and our partners. I think Polly Hudson makes a valid argument that prioritizing our kids doesn't necessarily mean neglecting our relationships. It's almost like, as parents, we have this natural instinct to put others before ourselves - in this case, our children.

πŸ‘₯ And isn't it true that many people would choose to save their partner over their child in an emergency situation? πŸš’ I mean, Hudson's story about her friend's experience is a great example of how these feelings can be deeply ingrained and not necessarily driven by malice. It just highlights the complexity of human emotions.

πŸ’• The thing that strikes me most about this debate is how it speaks to our societal expectations around parenting and relationships. We often put pressure on ourselves to balance both perfectly, without acknowledging that every family is unique in their needs and dynamics. Hudson's advice to approach challenges with empathy and understanding seems like a really wise one - especially when we're navigating the messy world of parenthood πŸ€·β€β™€οΈ
 
I think Gina Ford has a point, but only partially. I mean, we all know being a new parent can be overwhelming and it's easy to get caught up in our child's needs 24/7. My friend had her baby like 5 years ago and she still gets anxious about forgetting something essential for her little one. But at the same time, prioritizing your kid isn't always selfish... I think what Hudson said is true, love towards partner & kid aren't mutually exclusive. My sister's a great example of this - she loves her husband just as much as she loves their daughter, and vice versa. It's all about finding that balance 🀝
 
🀯 I totally get why Polly Hudson was triggered by Gina Ford's comments... as a mum myself πŸ€±β€β™€οΈ, I feel like you just can't put your love into words! For me, being a good parent means showing my kids love and care, but that doesn't mean neglecting my partner. We actually have a 'family date night' every week where we all sit down together and talk about our day πŸ’•. It's not always easy, but it makes us feel more connected as a team. I agree with Hudson that relationships are all about empathy and understanding - no one-size-fits-all solution here πŸ™…β€β™€οΈ
 
I'm like totally on team Polly here πŸ€—. I mean, priorities can be super tricky when you're a parent, but thinking of your child as an extension of yourself is actually kinda beautiful πŸ’•. It's all about finding that balance between being the best partner and the best parent, you know? Not one or the other, both! 🀝 And honestly, who doesn't love a good nap and some quality time with Bae (Baby) after they've survived sleep deprivation πŸ˜΄πŸ‘Ά. The idea that we have to choose between our child and our partner is just so... stressful πŸ’₯. I'm all about embracing the messy middle ground where love for both is, like, totally valid πŸ€—!
 
I'm low-key shocked that people still debating this πŸ’ΈπŸ’”. Like, can't we just love our kids and our partners without making it some kinda zero-sum game? 🀯 I mean, Gina Ford might have a point about priorities, but Polly Hudson's got me thinking – what if being an awesome parent means being an awesome partner too? 😊 It's not like we can turn off our mom instincts just because we're in a relationship. My sister's friend has two kids and her partner is always down to help with the night feedings... it's all about finding that balance, you feel? πŸ’–
 
I'm literally having a melt down just reading this... 😩 Like what even is the point of prioritizing one parent over the other? It's not like the parents can just 'choose' who to save in a burning building πŸš’. And don't even get me started on Gina Ford - I mean, who does she think she is telling people how to be good parents? πŸ™„

I do love Polly Hudson's point about how nurturing and protecting our loved ones is an instinctual response... that makes so much sense! 😊 But at the same time, it's crazy hard when you're sleep-deprived and feeling like a total failure as a parent. I mean, who hasn't felt like they just don't know what they're doing? 🀯

I think Hudson hit the nail on the head when she said there are no easy answers - we need to stop trying to fit into these 'perfect' family molds and just be real... πŸ’–
 
you know what i think about this whole thing... πŸ€” prioritizing ur child over partner might seem like a big deal but honestly its all about finding balance & communication in relationships πŸ’¬. it's not about choosing between who u love more, its about understanding that u both matter & being there for each other when needed 🀝. i think its also important to remember that everyone is different & what works 4 one fam might not work 4 another πŸ‘«. the key is to be aware of ur own feelings & needs as a parent & partner & make sure u're not neglecting any aspect of ur life 😊.
 
I'm not buying the whole Gina Ford thing. I mean, priorities aren't that black and white. My mate has two kids and they're never getting enough attention from their parents... but you know what? Their marriage is still going strong! It's all about finding a balance, innit? And let's be real, most mums (and dads) are already sleep-deprived because of work or whatever, so adding parenting to the mix is just gonna make things worse. Don't @ me with "self-care" and "me time" either... I get it, they're important, but when you've got a tiny human relying on you for survival, self-pity's not gonna cut it.
 
omg u think its ever easy 2 b a parent lol i feel like my whole life revolves around my kitty now πŸ±πŸ’€ i mean dont get me wrong i love my partner but my kitty needs me more like seriously who needs sleep anyway 😴 im not saying that Gina Ford is all bad but i can see why ppl would think her methods are too strict i personally think its just about finding that balance between work & family life u know like setting boundaries but still being present for ur loved ones 🀝
 
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